Tell me if this sounds familiar: you are innocently going about your day and then bam! Your brain notices something that you did and points out how that is SO you. And not in a good way, but in a super negative way. You suck. Now you’re feeling down on yourself and also frustrated for doing that thing, that you always do.
Yeah, I think you’ve been there. I know I have.
Entrepreneur, author, and motivational speaker Jim Rohn said to turn your frustration into fascination. I think this is a pretty cheesy phrase if we’re being totally honest here, but it helps me to remember a really important concept that helps me almost every day.
Essentially, when you notice yourself feeling frustrated about something, instead of going down the rabbit hole of beating yourself up and playing your “greatest hits” of shame and embarrassment, stop for a moment and get really curious.
First, ask yourself what you are feeling. Frustration? Shame? Anger? Name it and feel it.
Next, ask yourself what you were thinking. Dig deep here. You’re going to want to come up with something easy and untrue like “I was being an idiot again – like always!” Nope. Try again, bud. What are the facts? What stories are you making up (and believing) about the facts?
Finally.. Is it true? You’re going to probably say yes no matter what the first time you ask, so be sure to ask yourself again: Is this really true? If you feel stuck there, imagine what life would be like if you didn’t believe it. This is kind of a bomb to drop in your mind, but everything we believe, we are choosing to believe. You could honestly choose to believe something totally different. Open your mind to the possibility of what life could be like for you if you didn’t believe this.
An example.. One of my clients is an artist. She gets really frustrated with herself because when she’s supposed to be working, producing her art, she periodically finds herself distracted. When this happens, she gets so frustrated that she quits working for the day and stews about how easily distracted she is and how she can never control her thoughts and focus. After learning this process of getting curious and examining her thoughts, she was able to notice her distraction without judgement and continue working without frustration.
Is there something you’ve been getting frustrated with lately? Let’s chat about it.
